Lessons from Jacob: God, Did You Say

There are nights when sleep simply will not come. Your body is still, but your mind is

wrestling—holding what God said in one hand and what you see in the other, desperately trying to make the two agree.

God, did You say?

Jacob knew something about nights like that.

Before Jacob ever wrestled with God, he had obeyed Him. The Lord told him, “Return to the land of your fathers and to your kindred, and I will be with you” (Genesis 31:3 ESV).

So Jacob went—and that road led him straight toward Esau.

When Jacob learned that Esau was coming to meet him with four hundred men, Scripture says he was “greatly afraid and distressed” (Genesis 32:7 ESV).

God, You told me to come back here.
You said You would be with me.
You said You would do me good.

Jacob reminded God, “O LORD who said to me, ‘Return to your country and to your kindred, that I may do you good’” (Genesis 32:9 ESV).

I especially love the way the KJV renders that last promise:

“I will deal well with thee.”

Then Jacob asked plainly, “Please deliver me from the hand of my brother, from the hand of Esau...” (Genesis 32:11 ESV).

Jacob had a promise from God, but he also had four hundred men coming toward him. Fear sent him into self-preservation mode. He divided his family and possessions into two camps so that if one was attacked, the other might escape. He sent gifts ahead to appease Esau. He arranged everything he could arrange, but none of those human efforts could make Jacob certain of what awaited him in the morning.

God had told him to return.
God had promised to be with him.
God had promised to deal well with him.

And yet, Jacob was afraid. And still, Jacob wrestled.

How many times have we found ourselves in this very place, asking, God, did You say? We know what we heard. We stepped out in obedience. Then circumstances changed, fear crept in, and suddenly we found ourselves questioning what once seemed so certain.

But God had said it. And He would deal well with Jacob, just as He promised. What Jacob could not yet see was that before God dealt with what was waiting for him, He would deal with Jacob.

When we are wrestling with a decision, a circumstance, or the place God is leading us, perhaps our prayer shouldn't only be, God, change what is ahead of me. Perhaps it should also be, God, change me. Make me who I need to be to walk humbly and obediently into the place You are sending me.

Uncertain circumstances do not necessarily mean God didn't say it. Sometimes the very place that causes us to question what He said sends us seeking Him. And in seeking, we encounter Him—and encountering Him changes us.

I Want to Walk on the Water.

Continued in Lessons from Jacob, Part 2: When Wrestling Gives Way to Clinging

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